I have always grown up around animals.. I have seen come along and I have seen them go. I recieved news today coming home from school that my dog has supposely attacked nad killed 3 kittens. I don't believe. My dad won't put the dog down but I am afraid that if shie goes anywhere she will be put down. I have the choice to either have her put down or give her up. Though I don't want to, I have 3 choices, put her down, give her to the shelter, and give her to someone who might take her. I love my baby girl so much and I just can't take losing her. Living with that torment again would leave me depress..
The sad thing is, I don't get to say goodbye. All I can do is cry. They seem to be pouring.. It seems like no matter where I go or what I do. Nothing goes right. I will be depressed for the next couple of days and I am fine by that. I need some time to my thought. I need some time to think. I need to be by myself. Alone.
Away from the world.
My mom might think something else but I just want to be alone. I need to feel something besides the fact that I am angry. I laugh everyday and I love my friends but I need to just think. The world needs a break from me and I need a break from the world. So sleeping and crying help me get it out. Tonight I am shutting off my phone and listening to music. I will eat maybe but I might just write. Write that I am still depressed and thats okay. I can write poetry. I can yell and scream. Not trying to be anymore than myself inside. Just releasing and letting it flow.
I am no longer mad at my dad. I have forgiven him somewhat. My objective now is letting go. Letting go and burning all the bridges to my past. That's all I can do.
I pray that ya'll don't have a crappy day like me. God bless you all!
