It's been awhile since we talked and I can't say I miss you but you touched my heart with your cruel words.
The 4 words I knew you never meant but affected me deeply.
You won't understand what I did because no one cares enough to pull a move like I did.
My heart is intertwined with Jesus & God.
You can't fix anything except try and heal with Jesus & God in your heart.
I saved your life from something worse.
And though you will never talk to me, I hope you come across this and know that I do care and that my intentions were never to hurt but to help you!
Yes, I love you.
No, I do not want another relationship with because I would be crazy.
I will miss our friendship.
I put it at risk.
One day you will thank me.
One day you will find me
But you won't know what to say unless you change.
I can't say much except, take care of yourself.
Learn to pray.
Learn to TRULY love!
Give your heart to Jesus.
Fall in love with natural beauty around you.
And most importantly, never, NEVER forget where you came from!
Goodbye old friend, forever!
May God take care of you!
Love,
Your very caring Ex- girlfriend!
Monday, October 29, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
The Voice of Others!
I read the acticle of Amanda Todd's suicide. And it really got me to thinking. Society isn't all that is cracked up to be. We think eachone of us are fine and really were not. Some people deal with emotions so unspeakable of and it accumulates even more and more. I am working on a way to stop this but so far all I have is this blog. If you need to talk to someone, go to a local church.
Amanda went through some really hard stuff. It's hard to go through that and know that you might not ever be the same. I know I did. But I don't think she found God because in all of her story, their is not one thing about God and church. I really wish I would have been able to message her and reach out to her. But I know that God is calling me to help set up a suicide prevention and counseling or peer support group in my community.
I have an amazing church group that is willing to help me get it started. I do need to talk to someone else before this ever gets started. And I know what I want and what I need to do.
I have some current homework and church bible stuff to finish (that I really haven't even started). So I will come back here soon and give ya'll another topic to talk about.
But I am going to boost everyones confidence levels because I love making people feel great about themselves! Even if I say I don't like people.
YOU are beautiful, GOD Created YOU to be beautiful! YOU were design to LOVE GOD and serve HIM! GOD made You and HE LOVES YOU very much! Like you have no idea.
Like not even this much.
Or this much!
It's like way beyond this!
I'm going to start annoying people if I keep this up but yes God loves you and I hope you know your very beautiful! So pray and be beautiful! Thanks Everyone!
-The Christian Girl <3
Amanda went through some really hard stuff. It's hard to go through that and know that you might not ever be the same. I know I did. But I don't think she found God because in all of her story, their is not one thing about God and church. I really wish I would have been able to message her and reach out to her. But I know that God is calling me to help set up a suicide prevention and counseling or peer support group in my community.
I have an amazing church group that is willing to help me get it started. I do need to talk to someone else before this ever gets started. And I know what I want and what I need to do.
I have some current homework and church bible stuff to finish (that I really haven't even started). So I will come back here soon and give ya'll another topic to talk about.
But I am going to boost everyones confidence levels because I love making people feel great about themselves! Even if I say I don't like people.
YOU are beautiful, GOD Created YOU to be beautiful! YOU were design to LOVE GOD and serve HIM! GOD made You and HE LOVES YOU very much! Like you have no idea.
Like not even this much.
Or this much!
It's like way beyond this!
I'm going to start annoying people if I keep this up but yes God loves you and I hope you know your very beautiful! So pray and be beautiful! Thanks Everyone!
-The Christian Girl <3
Sunday, October 7, 2012
She's back!
Hey guys,
It's been awhile since I last posted and I am going to explain to why. I'm sorry if I have lost a lot of my readers but I am back now. Hopefully I can gain ya'll back. And even get more.
Back in Late April, my family went through a finical cut. We lost our internet and phones. It's been awile since we could get it back but we finally have. In that amazing time, I refoucused with God. I changed everything in my life.
In june I went to a mindblowing, heart- changing, bring you to your knees, church camp. Here is the things talked about and what happened.
Day 1- Truth (arrival)
I learned God was the truth of life. But I still wasn't full convinced again. We got there and unpacked. Made a awesome flag and everything. The end of that night we talked and had an amazing game night.
Day 2- Repentance
I was brought to my knees that night. Things had a changing point. It all sunk in. We had REC and dominated! (not very christian like but still) I had a awesome day and went swiming that night! Hunger game night!
Day 3- Dependence
I learned that I need to stop being so dang independent and let God have it. I got hit in the face that day. Kinda seems fair I guess. REC was crazy that day! Cowboys Vs. Alien Dance
Day 4- Unity
I learned to Unite as one with Christ! And my chirstian brother and sisters! Today was the last day! I was sad. But it was an amazing week.
Day 5-
We went back home! I loved all the friends I had made.
3 weeks after camp, I moved. I am still living with my mom and her boyfriend. I am in FFA and my art has became so much better. After the move I went to mission trip. Kanas City! An amazing week!
Day 1- I hate planes. I was on my first plane.. But I loved the clouds and seeing people smaller than me! We talked about VBS and I had so much fun!
Day 2- We went to a church and helped a feild day thing for kids and watched a rap group from hope city play! They were pretty great!
Day 3- We went to church and set up again for VBS and Than had VBS
Day 4- We went to the church and painted a house. We than went to VBS and had so much fun with kids.
Day 5- Last Day of VBS and we finsihed painting and cleaning the church up.
Day 6- We went swimming with the kids and than had a wedesnday night bible time with kids and some guy got a mohawk.
Day 7- Went shopping and went to a waterpark. We got rained out and went back to clean the dorms.
Day 8- We flew back home. I didn't want to leave either!
And now school and life groups have started and life is amazing. things have been worked out between my dad and step mom and me! Well I am getting off here! Bye guys!
It's been awhile since I last posted and I am going to explain to why. I'm sorry if I have lost a lot of my readers but I am back now. Hopefully I can gain ya'll back. And even get more.
Back in Late April, my family went through a finical cut. We lost our internet and phones. It's been awile since we could get it back but we finally have. In that amazing time, I refoucused with God. I changed everything in my life.
In june I went to a mindblowing, heart- changing, bring you to your knees, church camp. Here is the things talked about and what happened.
Day 1- Truth (arrival)
I learned God was the truth of life. But I still wasn't full convinced again. We got there and unpacked. Made a awesome flag and everything. The end of that night we talked and had an amazing game night.
Day 2- Repentance
I was brought to my knees that night. Things had a changing point. It all sunk in. We had REC and dominated! (not very christian like but still) I had a awesome day and went swiming that night! Hunger game night!
Day 3- Dependence
I learned that I need to stop being so dang independent and let God have it. I got hit in the face that day. Kinda seems fair I guess. REC was crazy that day! Cowboys Vs. Alien Dance
Day 4- Unity
I learned to Unite as one with Christ! And my chirstian brother and sisters! Today was the last day! I was sad. But it was an amazing week.
Day 5-
We went back home! I loved all the friends I had made.
3 weeks after camp, I moved. I am still living with my mom and her boyfriend. I am in FFA and my art has became so much better. After the move I went to mission trip. Kanas City! An amazing week!
Day 1- I hate planes. I was on my first plane.. But I loved the clouds and seeing people smaller than me! We talked about VBS and I had so much fun!
Day 2- We went to a church and helped a feild day thing for kids and watched a rap group from hope city play! They were pretty great!
Day 3- We went to church and set up again for VBS and Than had VBS
Day 4- We went to the church and painted a house. We than went to VBS and had so much fun with kids.
Day 5- Last Day of VBS and we finsihed painting and cleaning the church up.
Day 6- We went swimming with the kids and than had a wedesnday night bible time with kids and some guy got a mohawk.
Day 7- Went shopping and went to a waterpark. We got rained out and went back to clean the dorms.
Day 8- We flew back home. I didn't want to leave either!
And now school and life groups have started and life is amazing. things have been worked out between my dad and step mom and me! Well I am getting off here! Bye guys!
Boys
Recently, my bestfriend has devopled a crush but to him he thinks I like him back. I have sent a very clear message that I am not. He says he understands but than tells my bestfriend Kay that I like him. Well now that is just enough to make anyone mad.
Another thing he is doing is he has become very over-protective and clingy towards Kay and I. None of my friends want to hang around me with him around. He threatens my friends and my family. He will not stop. He is also a touchy feely guy. He likes to wrap his arms around me and I don't like it. I am not a touchy person with my guy friends. It gives the message that I am leading them on and I want something more than with them. That's why I am like that. I have repeatedly told him to stop. I don't like it. He continues on.
Yesterday, I went to church and invaded my church space. I feel the most safe at church. He was rude and kinda even demanding. No one was mad at him at the time. Things got worse. And they continue to progress. I was suppose to got to a movie and a concert. I don't want to go now. I have talked to his mom and she knows why.
Things calm down with my ex than turn around and get worse with my bestfriend. I am stressing out now. I feel so empty again. And I am fixing to go nuts again. Thats it for now. Bye!
-Her <3
Another thing he is doing is he has become very over-protective and clingy towards Kay and I. None of my friends want to hang around me with him around. He threatens my friends and my family. He will not stop. He is also a touchy feely guy. He likes to wrap his arms around me and I don't like it. I am not a touchy person with my guy friends. It gives the message that I am leading them on and I want something more than with them. That's why I am like that. I have repeatedly told him to stop. I don't like it. He continues on.
Yesterday, I went to church and invaded my church space. I feel the most safe at church. He was rude and kinda even demanding. No one was mad at him at the time. Things got worse. And they continue to progress. I was suppose to got to a movie and a concert. I don't want to go now. I have talked to his mom and she knows why.
Things calm down with my ex than turn around and get worse with my bestfriend. I am stressing out now. I feel so empty again. And I am fixing to go nuts again. Thats it for now. Bye!
-Her <3
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